Dildos make great entry-level sex toys. Their purpose is obvious to most, they come in a variety of sizes, and they don’t require extra skill to make them work. That doesn’t mean there aren’t things to know and learn, from the time you decide to buy one to the moment you use it.
We asked a few experts to share what they want you to know about buying and using dildos. Follow their advice, and you’ll have more sexual pleasure and a toy that lasts a long time.
Use the Right Lube
“Lube is always a great idea when using any sex toy, including a dildo,” says Rachel Gelman, president of Pelvic Wellness and Physical Therapy. “If the dildo is made out of silicone you should use a water-based lubricant as a silicone lubricant can degrade the silicone in the dildo.”
She continues, “Ideally, you want [to use] a lube without parabens, glycols, microbicides, and preservatives. The best lube is similar to your body’s pH. A healthy, happy vagina has a pH of 3.8 to 4.5, and for the rectum, is around 7.0, so you want a lube that matches or is a slightly higher pH than your natural environment.”
“When buying a dildo, your experience level determines what size to go for,” states Sandra Larson, nurse, and co-founder of Vennytoy. “If you’re a newbie, I recommend starting off with a four to a six-inch dildo. And if you run into the ‘monster’ dildos, just pass for now. You can always upgrade over time.”
Yes there’s such a thing as a too-big dildo. Choosing the right size dildo for you determines how good it feels when you use it.
Material Matters, Too
Larson continues, “Like every other sex toy, dildos are made from different materials. Everything from silicone, TPE, PVC, glass, and stainless steel, there’s something for everyone. For beginners, I recommend squishy materials like silicone because they’re ‘friendlier’ for starters. Over time, you can upgrade to the glass and steel options and enjoy temperature and more ‘rigid’ play.”
“Also, I recommend going for hypoallergenic and phthalate-free materials to prevent infections,” advises Larson. “Non-porous materials are also great because they are easy to clean and maintain in the long run. Silicone is the best material because it’s squishy, waterproof, and durable. Avoid cheap rubber materials that are porous because they’re easy to harbor infections.”
Consider Your Dildo’s Purpose
Sex educator Eric Graveris of Vennytoy.com advises asking yourself a few questions about how you plan to use your dildo to figure out its ultimate purpose.
“Do you want to use it anally, vaginally, for pegging? To target [the] G-spot [or the] P-spot? Do you want to use it hands-free (with a suction cup) or harness (with a flat base)?”
“For example, if you want G-spot stimulation, you want a curved dildo with a defined head which I would recommend to most people,” says Graveris. “In the same way, think about the firmness. For more robust G-spot targeting, you need a firmer dildo. However, for more enjoyable thrusting, you want something with medium-firmness. Unfortunately, no one size fits all, but if you’re unsure, look for an average length and average girth dildo that provides medium-firmness (or dual-density).”
Clean Your Dildo
“Cleaning your dildo and overall maintenance affects it’s longevity,” states Larson. “So, clean [it] with warm water and mild soap as soon as you’re done and air dry it before storage. Store in a clean, cool, and dry place too. You can also but a [sex] toy cleaner with your dildo to maintain the material’s integrity in the long run.”
Use Your Dildo Well
“Like sex, treat dildo usage with respect and make the experience memorable [for yourself],” advises Larson. “Put together a playlist, take a warm bath, and light the candles (unless you just want a quickie). Most importantly, use plenty of lube, start slow, and acclimatize in size and speed as you get used to the dildo.”
The right dildo feels amazing to use, fulfills your sexy fantasies, and is a lot of fun. Knowing how to pick the best one for you goes a long way to having great experiences and plenty of sexual pleasure. Use these tips when you shop to find the perfect dildo for you!